How do I know for sure and how do I overcome this? It's effected me in so many ways but they don't care at all to notice
For many people, especially women, much of their mental energy goes into stuffing their feelings so far down they don’t even know they have them. They spend their life pleasing others, seeking the approval of everyone but themselves.
For starters, you have to begin to think of anger as a constructive emotion. It’s a signal that your feelings are hurt and you must move into conflict resolution.
Take responsibility for your part. Ask yourself: How did my actions and the things I’ve said or failed to say helped to create this situation or crisis?
You need to seek out what will make the situation better in the future so this situation doesn’t arise again. What has been done, you can't change it, Learn from it.
Instead of taking the burden on yourself, you can simply talk to the person and share how you feel. It does not necessarily have to be an aggressive confrontation though. Just tell him what you fear and give your reasons behind this feeling.
If that person does care for you, he will realize his fault and try to make it up to you. But if that person truly is using you, he will probably back off. Either way, you should get it off your chest and throw the ball in his court.
In all honesty, my first advice to you is to ensure you do not let the action of one turn your life upside down. In this lifetime you will encounter many selfish and heartless individuals but it does not mean that you stop believing in the rest of the world.
We must learn to be strong, and overcome such pain.
You must be strong, and learn to live with such betrayals as they are part of life.
According to a study by Newberry around 4% people are accomplished liars and they can do pretty well.
You can a catch a person in his own web of lies by watching them carefully and asking them something they may not expect from you, basically which they are not prepared to answer to trip them up.
Behavior Changes and Gut Reactions will bring the truth in front of you.
Here’s some stuff to think about: 1) Why should you waste time on someone who doesn’t care about you or isn’t wiling to give up his on you? 2) Why waste emotions on someone who doesn’t reciprocate? 3) Why would you cry for someone who will never know, doesn’t even care and even if he did, wouldn’t care? 4) Why care, think, miss him when you get nothing back in return? 5) Why would you get depressed over a man who you know isn’t “the one” who is also ruining the chances of you meeting your perfect soul mate?
A good move here would be to start keeping your distance from that person or people. You don't need them to be happy, life has something for everyone. However, if they reach out to you, and show eagerness to stay close, you might want to give them a chance and come clean about how you feel.
However, if the other person or people show no interest, its a signal for you to move on and forget those people. If they really do care, they will be concerned about you going away, but if they don't, for you it will be good riddance.
In order to find out and be sure you can stop giving out things that person wants from you. It can be your time, attention, help, money, anything. When you stop giving, the other person will realize that you are of no use to him. If then, he leaves, or starts distancing himself, you know what he was after.
Getting over it can be easy if you think of it as a gain. You lost whatever you gave that person but that was the price you paid to get rid of him.
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Category: Relationships & Family | 10 years, 9 month(s) ago
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