Good men are dutiful men. They want to be effective in their lives, their careers, and their relationships. They are driven to be devoted and capable, and a good man wants to be the most important thing in the world to the woman in his life.
Unfortunately, people’s greatest strengths often hold the seeds of their deepest struggles, and that’s certainly true of the good and dutiful man. His need to be effective skews the way he views himself, his partner, and his relationship. It can even be a destructive force when he finds his loyalties overburdened outside the relationship, or when expectations change within it.
Despite its perils, that need for effectiveness remains an ancient and powerful force for good. It shapes men profoundly, and it is one of the most important things to understand about good and dutiful men.
Shawn Smith is a licensed psychologist in Denver, Colorado.
